‘I Hate the Word “Victim”’: An Exploration of Recognition of Domestic Violence in Same Sex Relationships1

In this article, drawing on interviews with women and men in same sex relationships who have experienced domestic violence, we explore the ways in which recognition of domestic violence can be hampered by public stories about the phenomenon and practices of love. Public stories construct domestic violence as a gendered, heterosexual phenomenon that is predominantly physical in nature. Victims of domestic violence are also constructed as ʹother, weak and passive. In addition, we argue that practices of love obfuscate practices of violence; and can also result in victim/survivors constructing themselves as stronger than the perpetrator who needs their care.